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Memento Mori- A Tribute to Death

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I saw a man die once [May. 5th, 2010|12:27 pm]
Memento Mori- A Tribute to Death

hour_of_death

[morty_baby]
..it was in a parking lot. He lay there pissing himself on the cold concrete with his groceries scattered about (a container of sour cream rolling away from him - I helpfully stopped it with my foot) and none of the dozen people that were milling there (including myself) knew CPR. I thought of just thumping him on the chest as I had seen on tv but I didn't. I regret it now, I am human after all. Watching the person that DID thump him on the chest as his lips turned blue and his life's breath floated above him I realized that I should have pushed the person away and thumped him in my own fashion but I did not. I was gutless and walked away after a while, groceries in hand and delicately stepping over the thin stream of urine to my car. Wiping the snot and tears from my face in the car I realized that life was indeed brutal and set out thereafter to take a CPR course. I didn't take that course, instead I decided to take a lazy and convoluted course and have a child that would take it for me years down the road. One day when I myself am laying in a parking lot with a thin stream of urine emanating from my crotchal area, I hope that she will be with me. As an afterthought, I guess I could have thumped him as hard as I could, in a blood-crazed frenzy. Who would have stopped me? Anyone else see someone die?
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[User Picture]From: morty_baby
2010-05-06 03:37 pm (UTC)
Hello sweetheart :)
Watching my parents die was the same experience, you've known them all your life and you just kind of expect them to be around longer, I guess. With my dad, he was 54 and one day, I will eclipse that age and when I do, I will raise a glass for him. I knew that he was going to die as he had terminal cancer and it ate away at him for 2 years. Actually, he was my favorite person and I looked after him as he was going through that journey. He wasn't having any fun confined to his bed a living skeleton, and wanted to die faster. I wanted him to die faster as well because it sucked to watch him in pain. I told him one day that I wished that I could take him to the SPCA and get him put down to make the excruciating pain he was in go away and he got it. We had planned to end his life 3 weeks before he died but he chickened out.
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[User Picture]From: morty_baby
2010-05-06 12:11 am (UTC)
This. This is why we fucking live.We all die. And then we all die.. It feels good to me. Every time we get to see or experence a loved one die it means that they are freaked out and we can say, hey I will be a witness. And I have been and it makes them feel a bit better. Or at leat it did with my nmom and dad. And my dog. A
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[User Picture]From: n3b3lh3xa
2010-05-05 11:53 pm (UTC)
Thanks for sharing. I haven't been there at the exact time of death but found my boyfriend less than an hour after he OD'd. I even saw his lip move so didn't realize he was gone. I guess nerves.
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[User Picture]From: morty_baby
2010-05-06 01:29 am (UTC)
I have watched it too many times. It sucks man. It's like it's in slowmotion. I hate it in one regard but in the other regard, in my case I got to say bye bye. I had a buddy that was aditcited to heroin and for as much as he was an asshole because of that, he was just a fucked up guy. To me, I loved him and I know that he was so much more than that. I miss him.
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[User Picture]From: morty_baby
2010-05-06 03:43 pm (UTC)
Yes, it's a journey that you make all by yourself. Nobody can be with you at the end, you are ultimately, all alone. In a perfect world, the parent dies before you, that is just the way it is. It must be horrible to have a child die before you.

I used to lay in the dark and cry when I was a (fucked up) little kid, thinking about my parents dying. I wonder if that's a common thing with little kids.
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[User Picture]From: morty_baby
2010-05-07 03:20 pm (UTC)
That's awful what happened to your brother. You have my condolences. Was he was alone when he passed, too?
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[User Picture]From: morty_baby
2010-05-08 03:08 pm (UTC)
Jeez, it's terrible what a human being will do to another and then leave them to die in an alley like so much garbage. Please tell me that they caught the bastard/s.
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[User Picture]From: morty_baby
2010-05-10 05:11 pm (UTC)
If his duffle bag was still beside him, I guess the motive probably wasn't theft. Or there was nothing of value in it. Some people are just so violent that there doesn't have to be a reason for their actions.
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